Re: [Relationship-Talk] : My wife and I

 

Suggest to buy Spanish fly. It works for me few weeks ago. I will be 49 years old. 

Sent from my iPhone4; Christina Shook.

Sorry you are having a hard time right now. And I agree with an earlier response that believes this to be hormonal. She might even be going through the change (menopause) early. Whatever the case maybe, you sound as though you love her very much. All I can say is she doesn't just need a therapist/counselor but she needs to see a physician as well. And you might want to try another counselor, someone who specializes and has experience with sexual issues. Something has to change or you will eventually find yourself going outside of the relationship for what you need and I'm sure that would not be pleasing to her. Just
because you saw a counselor doesn't mean that it was the right counselor for the two of you. Try someone different. Good luck to you and your wife. I hope you are able to work things out.

--- In Relationship-Talk@yahoogroups.com, Joe DeRouen <jderouen@...> wrote:
>
> I am 44 and she's 49. We met when I was 25 and she was 30, and have been
> married for almost 14 years. Our sex life was great, at first. She'd
> gone without sex for seven years before she met me, and I should have
> seen that as some sort of warning sign, I guess. But like I said, sex
> was great, in the beginning. And slowly, things started going away. She
> stopped liking me going down on her. After our son was born, her breasts
> were completely off limits. Even after she was finished breast feeding.
> She can't stand to have her breasts touched, let alone kissed. She
> developed knee problems and eventually had her knee replaced and we
> haven't had sex with her on top in 10+ years. It's always the same. She
> doesn't like kissing passionately, just pecks on the lips. Sex is really
> perfunctory. She doesn't want to be touched, and moreover doesn't
> understand why I want to touch her. She will touch me, or more
> accurately, touch my penis until I'm hard, and then it's me on top,
> missionary style. This is maybe twice a month. Occasionally she'll do
> limited oral sex on me, but then finish with her hand or missionary. She
> watches the clock, and it's never more than five minutes of oral sex.
>
> She says she has no libido and not to take it personally. It's not that
> she doesn't want to have sex with ME, it's that she just doesn't want to
> have sex, period. She has a lot of body issues and is a diabetic, and
> had a minor heart attack last year, and she says her nipples feel
> "wooden" and not at all pleasurable when I try to touch her there. I'm
> not allowed to touch her between the legs, or really anywhere. More than
> anything, I miss the kissing. I don't feel intimate at all with her anymore.
>
> We have an eleven-year-old son that I love with every ounce of my heart.
> I also love my wife, and I think she does love me, it's just turned
> platonic for her, and she truly can't understand why that bothers me. We
> have seen a marriage counselor, but she was very resistant to change,
> and nothing got better. I don't want to divorce her, I want a decent sex
> life again, but nothing that I try seems to work. It's maddening, and I
> don't see any way in which it's ever going to get better.
>

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